five months

little pup, i can hardly believe that you are five months old today. you can do so many things that make me so proud and so sad at the same time. you can pick up objects, play with them, and then set them back down. you've started throwing your toys out of reach and on to the floor so that your daddy or i have to get them for you. you are an expert roller when it comes to going from your back to your belly. you don't really care to roll from your belly to your back although you know how and it is clearly easier for you. instead, when you are tired of being on your tummy you fuss and wait for someone to flip you over.

also, much to my dismay, we started real food the weekend after thanksgiving. i really really really wanted to hold off a little longer, but girl, you were hangry. you'd look and stare so longingly at food any time we ate around you. sometimes you'd even open your mouth like a baby bird, as if it say, "feed me!" your very first bite was fresh avocado. it was not your jam. but you practiced "chewing" and swallowing and i would call it a success. your second bite was butternut squash with cinnamon and you loved that. you'd smile when you saw the spoon coming for you and open up your mouth just waiting for it.

you are getting much better with crowds although you'd prefer to have someone familiar to you holding you. i get it. i don't like strangers pawing all over me either. but you are polite enough to smile at people when they make ridiculous faces at you and talk in the highest, squeakiest voice audible to the human ear. but your politeness comes from daddy and you're definitely a southern sweetie. you don't have much of mommy's new jersey sass. yet.

this month has been incredibly busy. time with the three of us all together has been at an incredible premium and sweetie, i'm so sorry there's not more of it. but we make the most of what we get.

we celebrated my 29th birthday. i can't even. we celebrated your very first thanksgiving at home with a big meal. that you didn't get to enjoy. womp womp. we spent time with family and friends. and now, somehow, it is christmastime. we went and got your very first christmas tree and we watched christmas movies and listened to christmas music while we decorated the tree. 

right now your favorite things are: being carried around. looking at your hands. rolling. watching tv (so sue me. i let my baby watch tv sometimes). music (you LOVE music). being surprised by funny faces (sometimes this is also terrifying). 

pet peeves: the inability to crawl (you can crawl exactly one pace before you give up). strangers. sleeping through the night.

my favorite things are: your big brown eyes. the chubbiness (rolls errwhere). your giggle when you're really happy. your serious face. and cuddling you when you're sleepy.

this has been a really hard season for us. for me. i can't believe that five years ago i had just met your daddy. i had no idea we would get married. i just thought he was just a hot southern man. i can't believe a year ago i had just found out i was pregnant. girlfriend, it was devastating news. i really didn't think i had the you-know-what to grow and expel a human. but here you are, the very best part of our life. and i'm so thankful that on the toughest days i can look at your sweet little face. God knew what i'd need...you. i would have never believed it. but you are the grace of God in a little chubby package. we love you.